What does joy really even mean?

Joy can be defined in so many different ways.  Very simply, it comes down to one thing though, the feeling of happiness and pleasure within. But how do we create this if it’s not something that is natural to you, or you are surrounded by stress and negativity in your everyday lives, and are unsure of how to be positive in the face of adversity and struggle?

Have you ever tried to reconnect with yourself as a child, feeling that thing that really excites you, that you really love doing, the thing or people around you even that make your energy shoot up and make you feel happy inside? Or maybe you are really happy for someone else when they have achieved something great, or when someone has made you laugh for some reason, that makes you glow inside? Or maybe you have done something yourself selfless for someone else that has made them happy?

The only way to experience real, authentic joy is to ignite the light within you, and do things every single day to make us feel joy inside – this light can be found within every one of us (even though we may not be able to see it yet), and from personal experience, I have found that the more you shine your light and value your own self, and actually put it into practice and show yourself value, the more positive energy you will let off to the outside world and other people will start to value you and see you for what you are worth too, for who you really are.

I have always been one of those people that procrastinate and worry about what other people think of me, scared of being judged, of saying the wrong thing, of failing other people’s expectations, but the truth is that this is all a load of rubbish that is flying around in my head – they are just made up thoughts essentially, and not real. It does however seem very real, simply because the thoughts inside my head have created my reality. Like attracts like, so if you constantly give off a negative vibe, you will tend to attract more negative energy, and life may tend to feel hard and get you down more regularly than you would like. Negativity takes up a lot of space, time and energy, and needs to be limited as much as possible.

Positivity is a way of life, it’s a choice you can make about how you live to get the best out of life that you can, despite any obstacles that come your way.  The more you feed yourself with positivity, the more you will want – it’s quite addictive, but a good kind, and infectious too. When you start making a conscious effort to boost your self-esteem and confidence, you will notice the people all around you are changing too, which is such an amazing feeling, because the energy is shifting in a positive, contagious way.

Therefore, if you get into the habit of consciously feeding your mind with positive thoughts, stimulating your mind with things that bring you joy every day, then you will start to feel positive more regularly, and suddenly, life will just feel easier to manage. You don’t need to get sucked into negativity. Life isn’t easy, so we do need to pick our battles, especially as a parent, and know that some battles just aren’t worth fighting, and it’s important to just let these go as and when they come along, if only for our own peace of mind, to create more room for joy in life and to feel more energetic and motivate yourself to get through the day.

And don’t forget to appreciate these people that stick around and evolve with you, and of course any new people that come your way on your journey, it’s a very special thing to witness and experience. Be your own hero – take a look inside your heart. Though it is a long road, it’s worth every second of the journey and the emptiness will slowly disappear over time.

Believe in yourself and be patient – you’ll find your way.

Sara Benveniste

Sara is a mum of 3 and also a Mindset & Wellness coach. and through personal experience, helps people with low energy and chronic fatigue develop a healthier, more positive and creative growth mindset, and at the same time, nourish their mind, body and soul through self-love, good nutrition, music and mindfulness. She is also a linguist, and loves learning foreign languages, including French, Spanish and Italian, playing the flute and listening to music.

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