As a mum and someone who is now living in an era where technology is just everywhere – even our central heating and lights can be controlled by the internet (very frustrating when the internet is down which happens occasionally), so it is very hard to escape technology completely. And so we have to make a conscious effort to switch off, otherwise like housework, it is relentless the amount of time you can spend surfing the web or using any kind of social media if you don’t discipline yourself to stop.
On one hand, it is amazing how we can connect with like minded people from all over the world in an instant, but on the other hand, we can find ourselves easily lost in the world of the internet if we are not careful and forget about what it’s actually like to have human connection in your life.
Having easy access to technology can really make you think you are well connected but in fact, it’s not always the connection we really need as a human being. It’s not easy being a mum, as there is a lot of time spent alone in your own company working around the restricted time frame of school hours or holiday camps, or maybe you are waiting for the time the kids are in bed before you can connect with friends whether by phone or getting out of the house and interacting face to face with them. Maybe you have a baby or toddler like me who at this stage, don’t know many people with little ones the same age as my toddler, and need to entertain your child on your own and manage them all day long, all the highs and lows included. It is really hard on your sanity, and so there is such a constant need to relax and uplift, plus you do have to become more picky about which battles to fight and which to let go of. I realise that over the years as a mum, I have really missed simple old-fashioned human connection, the adult conversation, the mental stimulation and laughs to help me get through my day.
This is why I decided to run a weekly Summer Karaoke club during the school holidays (which are normally so very intense), as aside from helping to relieve my stress, I wanted to make live human connections with friends and like minded people who can feed off each other’s energy, fulfil a sense of belonging, and just release any tension and have some fun and sing without fear of being judged in a really warm environment and in small groups which are always nice too. And even though not everyone knows each other, we all get along well as we can share our own experiences of motherhood, let off some steam, and just get lost in the moment, and sing along and dance to our favourite tunes in our own private room.
Don’t let your human connections slide and technology control your life and relationships (it is very easily done as it is so addictive)…. Instead, take whatever action necessary to deepen your connections with real people too away from the distraction of technology, and focus on the task or activity or hobby you are doing one at a time wherever possible, and more importantly, enjoy the moment. It is these little mindful habits and moments we can create for ourselves that help determine the focus of our lives and help you to shine a light on each day.
How can you lose yourself in the moment, and form better connections with yourself and/or other people in the world around you?
Time and time again, I hear many women speak so negatively about themselves, and comparing themselves to others, in a way you wouldn’t talk to other people, and it niggles me – I do it too sometimes. Why do we do this??!
When we get excited and have fun, it allows us to access a brighter part of ourselves and it brings us a sense of newfound both mental and physical energy, and especially if you are consistent with doing what lights you up inside.
Mark Twain was right. There’s so much more to discover about ourselves when we start exploring within our very own selves that we never even knew existed.
We get so used to the routine in our daily lives that we sometimes forget to make fun a part of it too, especially if you are someone who gets overwhelmed easily just trying to keep up with everything (especially for me coming up to the end of the school year with doctors appointments, inductions, shows, school trips and sports days just fill up the calendar and a constant juggling act with my 3 kids). You may also be someone who has a routine involving tasks or chores that are mindless or unexciting like housework, cleaning, sorting through clothes, sitting in heavy traffic on and off all day long, a long train commute, and so on.
As someone with moderate hearing loss myself, I have always been told it’s ok to hide my aids underneath my hair and no-one will see it so I won’t need to worry about what people will think of how I look wearing hearing aids…
Do you ever feel powerless? And especially when things happen out of your control?