Last weekend, I went to a Chakra Dancing retreat, which was where I started my sound healing journey. This time, instead of going for a five-day retreat like I did just over two years ago, I went for just one day to learn about how I can incorporate art into my chakra dance classes. I have a Diploma in Chakra Dancing and Creative Meditation, and until now, since the retreat two years ago, I have been doing chakra dance – as well as singing – for my own self-care  to help me through life and my job search too which has become a mission of its own. And what an incredibly musical and sound healing journey it has been.

I keep coming across the idea of teaching and then I pull out, whether it’s the idea of teaching foreign languages, my native English as a foreign language, and now chakra dance. Even if the subject matter is one I love, there is this fear within me about teaching, of standing up in front of a group of people, of having my voice heard, and finally and more importantly, having to remember everything I’ve been preparing and working so hard for in the moment I’m up on stage, whether in the classroom or any kind of room really. The fear is real!!

On the other hand, I have been working through this fear especially over this past nine months through the process of going to interviews whilst looking for my ideal job opportunity that will help me find the balance I am looking for once and for all.

It always amazes me how many hours and how much work goes into preparing for an interview. It’s endless and a job in itself to find a job, and I can only ever give it my all with every opportunity that has come by me. That’s who I am, I give 110% to every job I do. I’m a perfectionist, which has its pros and cons – as a Copywriter, it is however a useful trait to pay very good attention to detail.

Instead of trying to remember too much information and overwhelming myself, what I’ve done recently is to do my best to remember things I’ve written down on the first two pages in my interview preparation document – which has evolved with me over time – with the most important things I really want to say in response to some key questions that are asked of me on the spot, eg. who am I, why I want the job, what excites me about the role, what are the key skills I have to offer etc. These are the main things I do my best to remember, even if it comes out a little different on the day. The rest I read over out loud but don’t put pressure on myself to have to remember on the day of the interview. It’s a good strategy as I feel it helps to reduce the pressure which then helps me to connect better with the interviewer so that I can answer the interview questions as mindfully and authentically as possible.

This is how I think about life too, how can we reduce the pressure of what we are doing, how can we make things more straightforward so there is less to worry about. Generally speaking, it’s when we are more relaxed that we give our best selves to others, not when we are nervous or under pressure. Everyone is unique of course, and some people thrive in high pressure roles – but it’s not for everyone.

At every stage, I’ve put in the self-work to improve the way I approach the questions with more resilience and calm, and I celebrate each stage of the process. Also, at every stage of my healing journey, I am learning more and more about what lights me up inside.  So even if I’m not given the actual job, I know I have taken a step in the right direction. I’m following that happy feeling right now as this is what gives me the most confidence. Joy is the ultimate goal for me. The next step has to feel good inside, so that I feel like I’m moving purposefully in alignment with the person I am becoming more of and also in alignment with what truly matters to me.

I’ve always been told that I don’t need to love what I do as a job, and that it’s just a job right? However, in an interview scenario, when putting yourself forward for a job in the application process, if this is a job you absolutely love and feel very passionate about, you end up feeling so aligned to the role, and sometimes at the end of the day, it really is just a question of whether the interviewer likes what you have to offer, whether your skills match what they are looking for, and also your personality too which I think tends to be the final deciding factor especially if you are going to be working closely with each other in the same team.

I would really like to feel a sense of purpose and shared passion for the work that I do.  It really motivates me when I can see how my hard work has benefited the team and organisation I am working for.

As someone with lived experience of hearing loss, I understand first-hand the importance of creativity, mindfulness and connection in building confidence and resilience, and this has become an important part of my being and something I’m not afraid to talk about.

Our wellbeing is so important as I’ve discovered through my own self-healing and personal growth, which is why I would love to change the face of mental health and wellbeing of children and adults too through mindfulness, creativity, music and movement, and in particular, parents and children with Special Educational Needs and Disabilities (SEND), supporting families through the challenges neurodiversity brings.

I would love to help both children and adults discover joy, purpose, a sense of calm and self-expression through community and creative engagement. I would love to play a key role in helping them improve their confidence and self-esteem, increase self-awareness and more importantly, help them access their positive, happy, spiritual self to learn about their own superpowers, passions and purpose in life, and to help them find creative ways to nurture and nourish their soul and wellbeing through the challenges that school life, life in general or SEND can bring.

I get a real kick out of making a difference to other people’s lives – helping them to proactively get the best out of life, access better opportunities in the future, and be able to enrich their lives in a positive, uplifting way.

It felt so good to be back at that chakra dancing retreat again this weekend. As soon as I got there, I realised this was where I was meant to be and it gave me a chance to reflect back to where I was at the start of my journey. It has been a really beautiful journey since then which I’m so grateful for being able to experience.

There is also something so incredibly divine and peaceful about being in the countryside, and Plumpton in West Sussex, where the course is based, is a really pretty place to be. When I arrived, the air felt fresh and still, and a bonus, the sun was shining – I didn’t need quite as many layers as I brought with. Plus I was there to dance through the chakras which warmed me up and I created some art and a vision board. I still remember always saying to myself and others for years that “I’m not a creative person” but everything about creativity I love now. It’s such an important part of me, I can’t believe I never saw this until now.